Saying goodbye to Grandpa

Last November Grandpa passed away on Thanksgiving Day.  It was a devastating blow to the entire family.  However, I count my many blessings that I was able to be there in the hospital room with him as he took his last breaths.  We had a memorial service several days later.  Grandpa was cremated -- but the family needed some time before we buried him.  We knew exactly where we were going to bury him, but it was winter, cold ... and I had to return home.  When I went home for my cousin's wedding, we all agreed it was the perfect time to bury him.

Most of the family gathered together on Sunday morning  -- Mother's Day -- to head out to my my dad's & Grandpa's hunting grounds, over an hour and a half away.  Twenty-two years ago (I might be off by a few years), my dad and grandpa went knocking door to door in the country, trying to find a place to hunt.  They happened upon this couple and became great friends with them over the years.  They said it would be an honor for them -- to have grandpa's ashes buried on their land.

So we arrived at their home to let them know we arrived, and lo & behold.... there are hummingbirds flying all over the place.  My grandparents have hummingbird feeders outside their house as well, but there were at least FIVE hummingbirds at one time eating!!  It was the neatest thing ever.  Hummingbirds always caught my grandparents attention and awe.

Then we drove to the part of the land in which this couple will soon build their new home.  My dad tells me this area of the meadow is where Mike has gotten many a deer -- so has Grandpa and I can't remember who else.

My cousin Herschel walks Grandma down to the site.

After we decide on the area which would be perfect, he and my aunt start digging. 

It becomes apparent that it is very hard, and full of rocks... so time to bring out the big tools!!

Everyone watches as Herschel & others took turns shoveling.

Even my brother takes a turn ..... He's wearing Grandpa's favorite hat.  

My grandpa loves the Royals (a baseball team in Kansas City) -- 

he'd sit in his chair every time a game played and cheered his beloved team on.

After a good amount of dirt was dug, it was time for our little service. 

My aunt read a poem written by my dad night/morning of. 

I told my parents that I wanted to find a metal box to put little mementos inside.  My grandma had some things she wanted to put with the urn, but I thought a metal box would do the trick.  Imagine my surprise on Saturday morning when I went to the garage sale across the street from my parents house, and I found the exact metal box I wanted to try to find......

Here my dad is explaining what we all put inside the box.  My grandpa's business card from back in the day.

A used gun shell -- my grandpa loved to hunt, and was happiest hunting.

My aunt holding up another Royals hat.

We put a picture of his beloved dog Buddy.  He loved that dog. 

We also wrote letters and put them inside the box as well.
We added a small plane because he was a pilot -- and a paper airplane as well.

Scattering dirt on my Grandpa's urn -- (I picked out the urn, which was given to us by my father & mother in law -- however, it wasn't big enough, so some of the ashes are in its original container).

We placed logs on his site, so that one day we could come back if we ever wanted to, 

and know where it was at. 

Saying goodbye.

At this point, I wanted to document the fact that I was there as well... 

so you can see me and my grandpa's burial site in the corner.

From left to right:  My cousin Herschel, his dad, my uncle Darwin, the man who owns this land, my dad and my brother Mike.

A picture of the family who came (and the two friends who owned the land)

I think my grandpa would be happy with his final resting place.

It's an incredibly beautiful area. 

On the way out, my dad took us to see one of my grandpa's stands when he went hunting.  They had quite a few scattered around the land.  My brother braved the tall grass (and snakes, ticks) to bring us this picture because we couldn't quite see anything.

On the way out, he snapped this picture of us waiting for him by the road.

Goodbye Grandpa.

You are missed sorely.

A void in our heart, really.
Till we meet again.....

My grandpa...

As I look back over the past week, I have so much to be grateful for.

Our little family was to make the trip to Kansas City for the week on Friday after work. However, Mike's body had other plans. He had kidney stones that basically crippled him for a few days. He just didn't think he could make the trip. I had gotten sick earlier that week, and was REALLY sick. Everything was stacked against us .... but I had this feeling. This STRONG feeling that I needed to be home. Mike had gone to the doctor, who refused to let him go back to work for over a week, and the doctor said "hey.... go home to KC for the week, I'll give you some medicine to help you endure the car trip." So, away we left.

We arrived early in the morning on Saturday. Spent a few days with Mike's family. My cousin Kasey's father passed away, and his funeral was on Monday afternoon, but it was 2.5 hours away. I just didn't think w/ my horrible cough I wanted to make that trip, because I would've been riding with my grandparents. I was so worried I would get them sick. I went to the Minute Clinic that morning, found out I had a sinus infection. So, I was on the mend finally with some antibiotics.

By Tuesday morning, I received an email from my mom, telling me that my grandpa was in the ICU at the local hospital. He had pneumonia. By that afternoon, we were visiting him. The girls & I watched him breathe so hard..... he was in pain just trying to breathe. He saw me and said "hi sweetie!", and tried to talk to me. I hushed him and said "Grandpa, it's probably better if you don't speak because your oxygen level goes down when you talk." When we said goodbye, I gave him my cheek to kiss, but he always goes for the lips.....

We visited on Wednesday, he was improving. Thursday morning he was holding steady. No more rattling in his lungs. He had a face mask on by this time to get better oxygen. Many many years ago, he was in a fire caused by chemicals (he was a firefighter), and endured some health problems because of this fire. As he got older, he developed pulmonary fibrosis.... and eventually had to be put on oxygen (just the week prior). Pulmonary fibrosis + pneumonia isn't a great thing.

Thursday morning the entire family meets at the hospital (totally not planned, we just all showed up at around the same time). He was asleep. Doing great. So, we all go home to prepare for our Thanksgiving dinner. By 1:00 that afternoon, we head over to my grandma's house. Then we get a phone call from my cousin, who hadn't seen Grandpa until that day. The death of her own father still fresh in her own mind. His oxygen level suddenly dropped majorly. He wasn't doing too well. I left Mike & the girls at my grandma's house and left with my parents. My brother was called. The entire family headed up to the hospital.

He suffered a heart attack, and then his oxygen level tanked. The doctor said he didn't think he had much longer. Everyone was called in.... and we waited for my final cousin to come in so we could take the mask off and let him die peacefully. We all whispered little words in his ear. Told him how much we loved him. Cried on his chest. Kissed his cheek. Rubbed his hair that he just cut so he could look as he did in his teens. We said goodbye.

He did die peacefully. It was so painful. The hardest thing I have ever had to go through. I have never experienced death of someone so close to me. I was always Grandpa's girl. My favorite place to sit was in his lap. His strong arms surrounding me. Listening to him hum songs and play his harmonica. He had a beautiful voice.

I've been pulling all the pictures together for a video, plus making his program and display table. I'm so proud of my grandpa. He was a wonderful man. He lived a great life, despite his imperfections. But in my eyes.... he didn't have any imperfections.